1. DECIDE to be more open. When you see people who have interesting experiences, laugh a lot, have stories to tell, notice how open they are. Even if you are not, the first step is to WANT to be more open. Intention is everything.

2. ASK yourself the time-honored question: What is the worst thing that could happen? Most often it isn’t even close to bad… much less the worst.

3. OBSERVE the open people you know and meet. Borrow a page from the PJ Livingston’s game-plan for overcoming Shyness. PJ is a CEO in the insurance field and a client who hired me to teach his people how to work rooms-- and is one of the best conversationalists and most open people I have met. He confessed to being morbidly shy as a teen. How he overcame his shyness was to observe the people who were more outgoing.

4. ASSESS what they did and didn’t do, what they say and don’t say.

5. IMITATE those behaviors.

6. NOTE the results (who did you meet, what did you learn, were there any bits of information you gleaned that would help you in the office, in your position, to get to a new one, did you make any viable connections with people?) Any possibilities? Opportunities that sound interesting?

7. FOLLOW UP on leads, ideas and information and that Creates your “Luck”. Use the TAP ® Method: be Timely and Appropriately Persistent.

8. REPEAT at every opportunity.

My favorite method of increasing openness is eavesdropping---and that can be very uncomfortable. However, we sometimes overhear that someone is looking for a specific restaurant or venue and we have the information they need. It’s not rude to say “I don’t mean to interrupt, but I overheard you say that you were looking for the art museum… here are the directions.” Responding to a comment made when you have something to add, directions to give, a tip about a reasonable parking lot or better yet--- ample street parking… is not only helpful, but usually is welcome.

©RoAne 2004